SPREAD EAGLE, Mongoose, and The Keg Killers. Steamers victoria Nov 17 2007

When I was young in the mid eighties I would go to this place called the Kings Hotel and drink beer and watch women strip. Twenty years later I'm back at the Kings Hotel, now called Steamers nightclub. Local music promoter Heather of Clove and Anchor productions has formulated another evening of absolute power and energy....she puts on some of the greatest shows of the underground. Three Beers for Clove and Anchor productions!!!
The place fills up and the first band is The Keg Killers from Victoria. There is about a hundred years of punk experience in this band and my favorite part of this band is no heavy metal riffs just pure impact. This is the kinda band that will probably never play on the Vans Warped Tour but if they did then I might actually check out the Vans Warped tour for a change! The microphone starts windmillin in the air and the jack boot guitar riffs start strumming out the hits! By the time you have seen the Keg Killers a couple of times you can't help singin their catchy songs to your self the next day.... "SCUMBAG" NAZI POPE" "CHACHI BEACH" "BLUE VELVET" and of coarse "SMOKES" all the punk hits man.
Next, Mongoose from East Van. A uniform group of young guys that had energy. Clean fast paced rock energy that attracted alot of girls to the dance floor. I am sure they would fit in the Vans Warped tour just nicely.
Now I started this review with the women I used to watch strip in this Kings Hotel some twenty years ago. These women where big, unshaven, powerful and maybe had a few pimples and band-aids. They where real women and I’m sure it was probably one of the first times in my life I actually saw a woman in the SPREAD EAGLE position. Twenty years later I am in front of the stage watching a band from Vancouver called SPREAD EAGLE. This band has big sound, is unshaven, powerful, probably had a few pimples but didn't need any band-aids because when they where done only stitches would hold their wounds together. Vancouver has been a hub of heavy rock music lately with bands like Three Inches Of Blood, Bison, and Grass City and SPREAD EAGLE fit in. Goosebumps formed on my arms as this band played their fast paced stomping rock. The dance floor even became a little bit of a battleground forwhile as the jock type girls started dancing. Not to be missed.

-ricky JaK

Eves Of Destruction Roller Derby
Too much with even bigger potential. I think its time for some more women to take to the wheels and go a few rounds. Now I had a blast. I was that loudmouthed heckler in the crowd! Those women went round the track feeling the place out. The sold out crowd was maximum and even more. It was the first and I think some carpet was laid for an even better event next time. It was my first time at seeing live roller derby so I really didn’t know what to expect come to think of it this was my first time seeing roller derby ever. Except for the beginning of the Highlander movie… wait that was Wrasling.
Now I guess if I wanted to see broken bones and blood I should go see “The Bloody Bettys Burlesque”. These girls where all padded up to allow for a safe impact on the floor. Bashin and bruising, double bangers, hip check, and bring the point girl around with a whip. I’m still a little foggy on the rules. Down she goes on her knees for a quick prayer and then she’s back up and merging in the pack for another bump. Ohhh there goes another girl on all fours and she’s spinnig a couple o 360’s almost into the crowd. The pack evens out and the girls a shoulder checkin like a drunk biker with-out rear view mirrors.
It was fun but I just wanted to say the TOOOO COOL crowd was just a little toooo conservative. O.K. the crowd had lots of tattoos and good looking people…. You know the kind. But most of them just sat there and looked cool…. Liven Up a little. Part of the experience is the crowd energy. If I hadn’t brought my daughter along to wolf howl and ky-yi-yi with me I would have had to just sit there like the tough lookin greaser beside me.

Good times though.

-ricky JaK

Tom Waits Tribute @ Solstice Café dec, 2007

With the possibility of Mr. Waits playing the SOFA on his upcoming tour a bunch of local musicians put together an evening of tribute. The evening was labeled “CLANG, BOOM, STEAM.” Or at least that’s what the gig poster said. It should have been called “YAWN, NOD, SLEEP.”
Now read the following in a very low rough voice like you just deep throated a wire brush.
“I entered this packed little smokey café on the outskirts of Market Square to find people sitting in rows; the place was quite as a church and a guy was strumming his acoustic guitar singin an older unrecognizable Tom Waits song. O.K. it wasn’t smokey. Still the people sat in silence barely moving to the song, the kinda way that only white people can do when they listen to music. The MC introduced another guy to the stage and he pulls out his acoustic guitar and repeats the same slow sleepy formula that would make Tom wanna pull out his gun and start shooting the walls and steel supports of this joint, some of the stray bullets bouncing into the crowd causing the floor to soak with a blood stained tear.”
Relax your throat now and take another pull on your brown bag. Not to get totally hated I in no way am saying the musicians weren’t good musicians. The place was filled with some of Victoria’s finest, and not all the performers played the acoustic stuff. It had its ups. Wouldn’t you know the moment I slip outside to indulge in some Copenhagen the ever beautiful Carolyn Mark gets on stage and I watch her through the sweat soaked window. My favorite for the evening was of coarse “The Children of Celebrities” These guys defiantly have a Tom Waits feel with their own mix of blue-grass. Also a be-bob interpretation by some young ladies and a drum machine mouthed man was quite good. The bottom line is I’m just a punk so I am probably not the guy who should be reviewing this acoustic guitar laden evening. But I love Tom Waits!
I personally own about four Tom Waits records that get regular play in my house. Tom Waits music makes me and my daughters dance in a fashion that no other music does. Tom Waits is wails, swoons, arm rising on your knee, take a bow then start to jig, throw a chair then pick the chair up and listen to the next story. Tom Waits is “CLANG BOOM STEAM”!!!!!

Cheers hippies! – ricky JaK

p.s. I was just fuckin with ya about Tom Waits playin the SOFA.

22 Annual Jaks Sk8 Team China Creek contest.

People of the earth and alleys, every second Saturday in September rain or shine the Vancouver Jaks Team has put on a skate contest in one of Canada’s oldest skate parks. Twenty two years Jaks have been hooking up music and locating prizes and creating a contest unlike any other. It a down to earth hardcore skateboard contest and the contestants are real people who live the skateboarding life. Snot nose little kids on Wal-mart boards to hardcore mobs like the China Creeps and the Slugs. All the contestants are 100% skateboarders. It’s loose its fun and its one big party. O.K. it ain’t the kinda contest that you’re gonna see covered on the sports channel.

The perimeter of the park fills with local folks from the surrounding apartments as well as punks, drunks and Vancouver funks. Simon Snotface “Jaks Team Chancelouer” struts around getting the contest judges lubed as well as finding the necessary papers and pens to conduct the contest….. The judging forms are ripped up pieces of beer boxes and the pens are liberated from any sweet lady or man carrying a purse. The social atmosphere is a buzz with folks re-uniting and exchanging hugs and beers and smokes. It’s a skate community that I really wish existed in my town. The high noon start time is now 2:00 when Jones Jak finally shows up with a sound system and a back seat full of prizes. Now the prizes for this contest are donated by some of the best. PD’s Hotshop has been the main supplier of prizes for this comp for years and lets face it Skull Skates, even though they are classier, are about as Jak as a skate company can get (no offence PD”). But hey we also had Sluggo who laid some RDS swag down as well as Circa, Inkbomb, Anti Social, Meridian Distributors, Lolitas, Coastline, HTO, Sitka, And TOP Notch Skateboards ……. There was a ton of prizes this year. Remember to support these companies and shops. Twenty years ago, the prizes for this comp where usually a beer, old skate magazine and maybe a used deck or wheels.

Let’s turn our focus to the center of the park and the main reason for this day. China Creek consists of a bath-tub shaped bowl and a tea-cup shaped bowl with no coping. A handful of wooden ramps have been constructed around perimeter but if you fall onto one of these ramps you are guaranteed to have enough slivers to heat your house for a night. Power is located from a house across the street and the Absolute Music begins. Ahhh the music, punk, metal and a dash of reggae is the basic adrenaline builder for the skaters. The drunken judges take their place and MC DDols Jak yells out the names of the first skaters. This is the female category and a handful of women work the park and I seem to think they skate equal to the men so why have a separate category? The next category is the gay men division… But the standing rule at the Jaks contest is that no Jaks may enter this contest… needless to say no men entered the gay category today. The beginners take to the concrete and these little snot-nosers get some well deserved crowd cheers when a trick is attempted and bailed or landed. Intermediate has the most entered with some sick punk stuff as well as hip hop tricks. Then came the heavies…. the advanced. The park was a swill with style and hard looks when these older men started bustin the tricks. The judges had wandered drunkenly off from their duties and Telly Jak was left standing with the microphone, a slip of paper and the final heat. He belted out names and took score…. In the end we saw Punker Matt from the China Creeps come humpin out of the tub to hit this 3 foot wooden death ¼ pipe. The dude left the short ramp and contorted into this crail type lean to tail that looked like we should be phoning an ambulance. The tail of his board slaps the coping and he rides it out to a quality skid row cheer. He walked away with the prized “Deerman of the dark woods” skateboard deck. The contest came to an end with an all out SLUG jam…. “The Slugs”

The sun shone and the contest was over for another year…. It was a perfect day. It’s funny how a contest can be held for twenty two years on unorganization, chaos, anarchy, loud music and drunkenness. Meanwhile The Slam City Jam claims to be the longest running skateboard event….WRONG!
JAKS TEAM T.A. MEMORIAL CHINA CREEK SKATE CONTEST 22 YEARS and still strong mother.

-ricky jak

Back on the blogger.

Hey i have been kinda missing this... couldn't get it to work and what the hell... I just better get those written blobs i have been posting on myspace and live victoria. anyway back at the blog.

love ricky

p.s. this is a photo of me at the JaKs reunion this year show how Wisk removes ring around the colors.